Σάββατο, 1 Ιουνίου 2013
When did things get so complicated? When did it all become so confusing? When did I become cold again?
I can't see through the tears. And I have a mind-splitting headache from too much thinking? From crying? Does it even matter why I have a god damn headache? Fact is, I have it.
Ήταν εδώ and I felt nothing. No, I actually felt helpless. Helpless, that's it. It was the only thing I felt. Helpless. Shit hit the fan. Το γάλα χύθηκε. Damage is done. So I'm feeling helpless because I cannot undo all this. I cannot fix this.
Με άγγιξε and I felt nothing. Δεν υπάρχει κάτι όρθιο μέσα μου, κάτι λειτουργήσιμο, αυτήν την στιγμή για να νιώσω κάτι. Ι only feel helpless. I don't dare say hopeless; I'm hoping that this won't be another sleepless night, I'm hoping this will be over soon, I hope I'll be feeling like myself again soon. So for now, I'm just helpless.
Helpless against the facts. Helpless against my feelings. Just helpless.
So unhold me, please. That space in my heart? Give it back, please. Those feelings? Undo them. Please. I can't find any comfort here right now.
You said I shine. You've said that for years. That I shine. That I'm made that way. Look at me now. Tarnished. And definitely not shiny.
So unhold me please. I'm tired.